What you see is a strong, confident guy.
He strive alongside others for what he believe.
He have seen his future. He had it all sorted out.
He worked night and days to get what he wanted.
He live with glory, he smiled and laugh all day long.
He go out with his friends, he looks like having a lot of fun.
He don't seem to care for a thing. Nothing seems to be able to bring him down.
He don't look troubled. He just look happy.
What you don't see is a powerless man.
Troubled and destroyed.
Torn apart bit by bit from the inside.
Regretting every moment of his existence.
Scared of every seconds that passed by.
Living his life for others, and only others.
If it is not for those he loved, he might well be gone.
Won't look back to his past, for it was mocking him.
Wouldn't dare to stare at the future, feared it will just get worst.
Filled with regrets, disappointment and rage. Rebellious hormones.
Tired. Just too tired to even get up in the morning or go to bed at night.
His head filled with realization how ugly thing will turn out to be every passing moment.
He's screwed. He's too far gone.
Far, deep in his heart, he knows and believe.
That God does work in a mysterious way.
He have a plan for everyone, and of course, everything.
But yeah, it was too deep he doesn't even know it was there.
What you don't know is he's there. Man, he's really there.
He's more than what you see he is.
Sometimes he asked himself, what have he done to deserve this?
And somewhere he heard a voice, replying, "Nothing."
He felt too young to carry such a burden. Overwhelming his head.
There's too much things at one time. Too much for him.
And yet he keep his head cool, he won't tell.
No he won't. No one can actually understand what he feels, so what's the point?
He's not longing for the same supposed-to-be-working words.
Funny isn't it.
Just a big fat joke.
p.s. poor guy :(