It's been a while since last I wrote in English.
Now let's see where I left off and if I still have what it takes.
You, sir, won't last a moment in my shoes. Oh, forget that. Another whiny post. Nah, doesn't cut it right. Move on.
Oh well, happy new year everyone! We will all be dead soon! Or so they say. And hell yes, I end the year 2011 being single and I like it. Whoa. Doesn't ever expect it to be this hard. But yet I survived.
Wow. I survived.
The thoughts is killing me inside out. For perseverance is nothing easy nor close. Strength built up high and crumbled in a moment of thought.
And yet the heart screams out for peace, for calamity, which is of uncertainty and full of doubt.
Its amazing how you watch your life come tumbling down in a blink of an eye, and how much you would go to make it all right again.
But just knowing the fact that you can't is far, far more agonizing. To go on with what is left, to pursue the uncertainty with hope, and luck, and to wish for something possibly remain unfulfilled, and to continue with false effort which seems worthless.
This burden to carry is mine, yet I refuse to carry it.
When they say the weight of the world on your shoulder, I never thought they mean that literally. Well it seems like they does.
For summary of 2011, I have gone through a very hard time, and still struggling to pull myself out of this deep shit I have brought myself into. Whatever will happen in the future, when I thought things can't get any worst, is embraced by will and courage. Whatever brought to my face, whatever obstacles on the way, I shall accept it, I shall face the music and keep trying.
Well, speaking of tired.
I am tired.
Hell, I'm terribly do.
I need more than just a good night sleep.
I need a savior. I need a superman. I need superhuman strength.
Or just hope. Just a plain fucking hope.
There you go, story of my life.
So fuck you, 2011.